Showing posts with label joys. Show all posts
Showing posts with label joys. Show all posts

Sunday, March 15, 2026

Everyday Treasures

I believe I was literally made to write, and I can't think of anything I love more. Ever since I moved into a refugee community in August, there has been plenty to write about. The only problem is that I've been so busy living that there has been no time to write about living. 

As you may recall, I had reservations about moving into a low-income apartment in a bad part of town, not the least of which was leaving my big, beloved kitchen. In truth, I didn't know the half of the indignities and inconveniences that I would endure here. None of that matters, though. After about eight months in this community, I have to say that I am living my best life. In fact, when Jesus promised to give us abundant life if we follow him, surely this is the kind of life he must have been talking about. 

I don't have time to write all my stories, nor do you have time to read them all. So I've decided to try to paint a few word pictures of the everyday beauty of this precious community, of moments that I will always treasure.

Daily Rhythms

Each night, I fall asleep to muted traffic sounds and the sounds of people right outside my window: shouting children running and playing on the playground and adults laughing and talking in languages I can't understand. At first those sounds made it hard to fall asleep, but now it all reminds me that I am not alone and that this city teems with life.

In the mornings I hear other people's plumbing and cars starting and babies crying. As I open the vertical blinds in my living room to let in the light, I'm sometimes greeted with waves from neighbors climbing into their cars. Often, when I'm racing to the car, carrying my breakfast, Ariana* and Safya's* father and their toddler sister greet me warmly as they exit their car, returning from dropping Ariana at school. Little Fawzia* smiles and waves proudly. "Hi! Hi! Hi!" she repeats as they climb the stairs to their house.

Every morning, I watch for a short, bald African man who looks like he could be in his late sixties. He might be sitting at a picnic table in the covered area right outside my kitchen window, or he might be walking through the complex, or he might be on the sidewalk, returning from a walk down the road I take to the interstate. He doesn't always see me since I'm inside the car, but if he does, I can always count on the same response to my smile and wave: a wide grin and a raised fist pumping the air with the thumbs-up sign. 

I've spoken to him before, but he doesn't speak English. All he ever says to me when he gives that thumbs-up is, "Hello! Good?" 

I raise my own fist and point my thumb to the sky several times. "Good!" I shout. 

A very special morning will include a sighting of Tall Girl with Curly Hair. I think she's about 16. She wears mostly black and carries a backpack. Her shoulders are hunched as if she's trying to make herself look smaller, and her eyes are downcast. Her skin is pale, and her hair is magnificent, tall and very curly, almost an Afro, with a blue streak on one side. I have a feeling she doesn't realize she is beautiful, perhaps because she doesn't fit the mold of what we tend to prize in female features. 

Whenever the timing was just right, I used to see her once in a week or two, passing by as I fumbled to get all my things into my car. I would smile and wave if I had a free hand, but she never looked up to see. One morning shortly before Christmas break, I was thrilled to see her because it had been several weeks and I'd been afraid that she might have moved away. I absolutely could not resist stepping out of the car to call out, "Good morning! Have a great day!" 

She started at the sound of my voice, and her eyes widened in surprise. I think her eyes rolled just a little, not as a cruel gesture, but more like an involuntary revelation of what she must have been thinking: "What's with this middle-aged lady, and why is she talking to me?" 

She didn't speak, but she nodded and smiled grudgingly, the way teenagers often do. My cheeks flooded with heat, and I remembered how years ago, whenever I would greet strangers, Ethan would hiss, "Mama! Don't do that. It's weird."

That was the very last morning that I saw Tall Girl passing down my sidewalk, but sometimes I still see her walking through the playground behind my apartment or walking through the parking lot toward the front gate, which is the only exit for both cars and foot traffic. I realize she probably changed her route to avoid me, but I still grin when I spot her. I resist the urge to roll down the window and wish her a good morning, but I always say out loud, "Have a wonderful day." And then I pray that she will, and that someone will make her feel loved and seen that day. 

As I wind my way through the complex, trying to dodge the ridiculously high speed bumps, I sometimes see some of my students from English class clustered together, walking back from dropping their children at the elementary across the street. Some are dressed all in black, and others wear long, bright, flowing dresses in every hue. Their head coverings are often embroidered with sequins, gems, or tiny mirrors that glint in the morning sun. Many push strollers or clutch their younger children's tiny hands. 

I can't say exactly how I recognize them since most of them wear surgical masks, so that only their warm, brown eyes are visible. For them, I often do roll down my window and shout a good morning, and they reward me with delighted smiles that crinkle their eyes. If my car is close enough, I can hear their heavily accented "good mornings" in reply.

Sunday, December 28, 2025

Christmas Lessons

As the miraculous events of Jesus's birth unfolded, such as the angels' visit to the shepherds, his mother Mary "treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart" (Luke 2:19). This Christmas season, more than any other I can remember, has brought many moments that I have treasured up in my heart, though there were other experiences that I would prefer to forget. 

It has been a season of firsts. For example, on the weekend after Thanksgiving, my heart was heavy because it was my first time to decorate the tree without both of my children present. In fact, neither one could be there; Ethan was working a 14-day shift in South Texas, and Allyson was finishing the semester at Western Washington University. 

My young neighbors, Ariana* and Safya*, were thrilled to help me out. It was their first time to decorate a tree, and they could not have been more excited. As they hung ornaments much older than they are, they peppered me with questions about the stories behind each one. I proudly identified the ornaments that had been made by Ethan and Allyson throughout their childhoods.

After the girls had left, Amy pointed out that most of the ornaments were clustered in the lower, front part of the tree. Our roommate and ministry partner, Moain, quickly redistributed the ornaments more evenly. If the girls noticed the change when they returned later that day, they didn't mention it. Their two-year-old sister Fawzia* noticed all the ornaments. She pulled glass balls, Santa Clauses, and school craft ornaments off the bottom branches, one by one. One by one, I moved the breakable ornaments to the top of the tree. Fawzia's play ended when she clapped her hands after dropping and shattering a glass ball. From that point, we had to herd her away from the tree each time she visited. 

The next day, I presented each sister with an ornament of her own to hang. Ariana got a cute cat in a pink and red dress, because she is crazy about my cats, especially naughty CiCi. Safya got a tiny pan of Christmas cookies, and Fawzia got an unbreakable cloth Santa Claus. "We will pack these away and use them every year, just like the others," I explained. "When we see them, we will always remember our first Christmas with you."

Saturday, November 29, 2025

The Best Party

Of course, I knew the thing Ariana* wanted most for her birthday party; she'd been asking me for artificial nails for months. Having never bought fake nails for a little girl, I thought it wise to take her with me. I also thought it might be fun to let her choose the decorations for her party, so we killed two birds with one stone with a trip to the nearby Dollar Tree on Saturday, the day before her party. 

On the way there, I warned, "We're here for party decorations. You'll see lots of things you'd like me to buy for you, but the only gift I will buy you here is nails. That's because opening birthday presents is much more fun when you can be surprised."

"Okay, just nails," she agreed.

She shocked me by keeping her word, but we still spent a crazy amount of time deliberating on the different styles of nails. What Ariana dearly wanted was nail glue, and the nails were simply the justification for buying the glue. "Do these ones need glue?" she asked over and over at each child-size set that I presented to her.

I removed my distance glasses and extended the boxes as far from my eyes as my arms would allow, squinting at the tiny print. "No, these say no glue required." 

It turned out that only the adult-size nails required glue, which made perfect sense. "But I want glue!" Ariana wailed when I told her she could get twice as many kid nails if we didn't have to buy glue.

"Okay," I agreed. "But these probably won't fit."

Grudgingly, she consented to a compromise: one set of adorable kids' stick-on nails and one set of long, adult nails, plus a two-pack of nail glue. 

She then agonized over whether to buy a birthday crown and sash or a set of party hats and noisemakers; although I could have bought all of it, I decided I didn't want to turn her into a spoiled American kid, so I made her choose. She chose the latter so she could share them with her guests. 

The Big Day

After church on Sunday, I barricaded the door against the girls so that I could decorate. However, running to the door in response to their continual knocking was cutting into my very limited time, so I finally heaved a big sigh and let them in. "People don't usually decorate for their own birthdays," I explained, "but I could really use your help."

While Safya* helped me cover the table with the white cloth that Ariana had selected, Ariana begged me to help her put on her nails for the party. 

"I don't have time," I told her repeatedly. "Your party starts in just a minute, and I'm no good at nails anyway." 

"But I need help!" she insisted. 

Just then, my new friend Amy arrived with a bunch of balloons. I thanked her profusely for agreeing to help with the party on such short notice. She graciously sat down with the desperate Ariana and helped her stick on the nails.

Birthday Nail Salon

Flawless!

It was now after the scheduled 2:00 starting time, but there was no sign of any guests, so Amy, my sister Amy, and I had plenty of time to blow up all the balloons. I laid out the ice cream cake, the mango juice, and the matching napkins and plates that Ariana had chosen. 


Around 2:20, Ariana's mother, Sediqa,* poked her head in the door. She took one look at my full-length party dress juxtaposed against Ariana's jeans and T-shirt, and then she launched into some rapid-fire scolding in their first language. 

"She says I have to go change," Ariana explained. 

"Okay. But hurry," I said. "Your party was supposed to start 20 minutes ago." 

My Party Dress, a Gift from My Friend Angie

It was around this time that Morgan, another new friend, arrived. My mom had just finished helping my sister into her party dress, and the two of them joined the rest of us in the now festive living room. As we awkwardly awaited the guest of honor and her friends, I noticed that the ice cream cake was starting to melt, so I carefully carried it back to the freezer. 

Around 2:45, Ariana came to the door wearing a gorgeous white lace dress, accompanied by four random children who had probably just happened along at that moment. I had to turn two of them away. "I need to meet your mom before you can come in my house," I explained. They ran away in search of their mothers, and the others came inside.

By 3:00, Sediqa and Safya had joined us, each wearing a beautiful dress and makeup. Safya's dress matched Ariana's, and they looked so charming together. 

One of the moms who came to grant permission to her daughter came inside, along with the lone boy's mother and two younger siblings. We now had a houseful of pretty rowdy children. 

I pulled the cake back out and spread a beautiful leather cloth over the rug for the children to eat on; this traditional mat from Pakistan had been a gift from my friend Angie, who has a refugee ministry. 

It was fun to watch the self-conscious joy play over Ariana's face while we sang her happy birthday. I had to light the candles twice, though, because the little boy blew out the candles before she had a chance to. 

After that, Amy and Morgan graciously served the cake and juice. One is a teacher and the other a former teacher, and they managed the unruly children beautifully.

I was surprised and very proud to discover that Ariana shares her mother's gift of hospitality. Before she accepted a bite of food, she served each child and mother cake and juice, and then she made the rounds to refill each juice cup. Only when the cake was nearly gone did Morgan finally convince her to take a piece for herself. 

Things Go South...

Shortly after the cake had been served, I noticed absently that a large portion of the tablecloth was gone. As I pondered the meaning of this, some warm juice splashed onto my bare feet. My eyes widened when I saw the source of the liquid: the youngest girl, whose mother had just slapped her on the back and who now bent from the waist, gazing at a puddle of orange on the beautiful leather mat. "Maybe she choked," I thought as I sprang for a dish towel to wipe my feet and then the mat. 

Meanwhile, the little girl's older brother was wreaking havoc by popping the balloons, which severely agitated Ariana. "Stop breaking the balloons!" I warned sternly. But the moment my back was turned, I heard another one break, and then another. 

Next, I heard Ariana's shrieks when the same boy tried to open her gifts. I sternly admonished him that if he couldn't listen, he'd have to go home. He settled down then, at least for the moment. 

In the middle of this bedlam, I loudly said a prayer over Ariana, thanking God for the joy she brings to everyone and asking him to bless her all through her next year of life. 

After all her impatience over the birthday party, I was surprised when Ariana decided to wait to open her presents until the other guests had left. Based on what I have observed at other parties here, I think this is part of their culture. Perhaps it would seem rude to open gifts that would not be shared with the guests. 

I was happy that she wanted us to be there when she opened the gifts. It was particularly gratifying to see her joy when she saw the Bop It toy that Amy had chosen.

After all the guests had left except for Sediqa and her girls, Morgan and Amy explained what had happened to the tablecloth. Right after eating the ice cream cake, the little girl had vomited on the table. "We think she might have lactose intolerance," Morgan said. Unfazed, she and Amy had ripped the tablecloth in half and bundled the mess into the overflowing trash bag. 

I shuddered as I realized it had been vomit that was spewed on my feet. I resolved to scrub them with soap and water at the first opportunity. 

...But All Is Well

As Sediqa vacuumed up the confetti that had escaped from the broken balloons, I ruefully contemplated all the frustrations of the wild party. It was just at this moment that Ariana proclaimed, with a radiant smile that made her brown eyes sparkle, "This was the best party." 

I was reminded of the disastrous trip to Central Market with Allyson back when she was a toddler and how all my stress had melted away when she said, "That was so much fun, Mommy!" 

Despite the aggravations, I have to say that Ariana's very first birthday party was a huge success. I hope she will remember the experience for a very long time to come.

*Names changed to protect privacy


Tuesday, October 14, 2025

A Good House

We took possession of our apartment on Saturday, July 12, though we wouldn't move in until the 21st. On that first day, I met my dear friend Diana at the apartment office, where we had to wait quite a long time for the key. It turned out that a window in the master bedroom had been broken, and the leasing agent, Stephanie, had to get a maintenance person out to fix it. 

"Your apartment had been vacant quite a while," she explained. "Teenagers like to break the windows in vacant units. After you move in, it shouldn't be a problem. "Also, there's a problem with the air conditioner. I've opened a ticket, though."

My heart sank. Was this going to be my life now? 

When we arrived at the apartment, things immediately started to look up. In the building across the breezeway from mine, a woman, two young girls, and a toddler leaned out the window to get a better look at us. The girls had glossy black curls, and the mother's hair was covered with a beautiful scarf. They made a lovely picture, framed on each side with beautiful, fluttering curtains embroidered with maroon flowers. 

"Hi! Do you have kids for us to play with?" the oldest girl called down.

"No, my children are grown up," I said. "They don't live with me. But my sister and my mother will stay with me." 

"Oh," the older girls chorused. The mom smiled wordlessly and waved, and so did the toddler. 

As Diana and I approached the apartment, we saw a man standing outside the door, watching curiously and grinning from ear to ear.

Stephanie, who was waiting for us inside, said, "That's... oh, I can't think of his name. That's your neighbor upstairs." 

"My name is Basir*," the man said.

"Oh, yes. Basir!" Stephanie said. "Good morning, Basir."

"My name is Sarah," I said, extending my hand. "It's good to meet you." 

"Good morning, Sah-dah!" he said in a booming voice that seemed out of place given his slight frame. 

"There's a lot of glass," Stephanie said. "Did you bring a vacuum cleaner?"

"No," I said.

"What you need?" asked Basir.

"The window broke," I said. "There is glass. Do you have a..." I mimicked vacuuming. "...vacuum cleaner?" 

"Yes! You can use." He hurried upstairs to the apartment where we'd seen the three girls and the pretty mom.

Diana and I spent the next hour or so vacuuming glass from every room in the apartment and spreading boric acid along every baseboard, in the walls behind the outlet covers, and in the cabinets and drawers. (I have put out boric acid in every dwelling I've lived in ever since I discovered how effective it is at preventing cockroaches.) 

We'd been working about ten minutes when we heard young voices calling hello in the hallway. The two girls had come downstairs and let themselves in the front door. "What are your names?" I asked.

"I'm Ariana,*" the older one said. "I'm seven. And she's Safya*"

"I Safya," the little one echoed. She held up five fingers.

"You're five?" I asked. 

She nodded vigorously.

As I gave the girls a tour of the four small bedrooms and two bathrooms, Ariana could not stop exclaiming over it. Seeing it all through her eyes changed my own perspective of this small apartment.

"This is a good house!" she said.

"Yes, it is," Diana and I agreed. And then the two girls were gone, without a goodbye.

A little later, several of my Bible study friends came by to pray over the house with us. We were praying in the master bedroom when Ariana and Safya reappeared. I knew then that I would need to keep the door locked if I wanted any semblance of privacy here.

"What are you doing?" asked Ariana.

"We're praying for my house," I said.

"Why?"

"We want God to bless everyone who comes in this house, and we want Him to protect us," I explained. "Do you want to stay with us while we pray?"

She shrugged and nodded. 

"You'll have to be very quiet," I said. 

The two girls moved from room to room with us while we prayed the most wonderful scriptures and blessings. They were indeed very quiet, which was probably the only time that would ever happen. 

After everyone had gone, I carried the vacuum cleaner and the roach powder upstairs; Ariana had informed me that they had lots of roaches, which made me shudder in dread. I hoped those bugs wouldn't cross through the roof to my house.

At the top of the stairs, I found an open door with a pile of shoes of various sizes in front of it. 

"Come in!" Basir called out in his booming voice. I shook off my flip flops, adding them to the pile, and stepped onto a colorful Persian rug. 

"Sit!" Basir urged, gesturing to a long cushion that lined the wall under the windows. I eased down onto the cushion and leaned against one of the velvet-covered pillows. It was surprisingly comfortable, but I hoped my creaky knees wouldn't protest when it was time to stand up. 

"I'm Sarah," I said to the woman. "What's your name?"

"Sediqa*," she said.

"Sa-dee-kah?" I repeated. 

"Yes!" 

Then she asked me something that I couldn't understand.

"She say, did you eat?" Basir explained. 

"Yes, my friend and I went out for lunch," I said.

"Tea?" she asked.

"Yes, please." 

About five minutes later, the woman unfurled a sheet of plastic onto the rug and set a saucer and a tiny teacup on top of it. Then she set a large hunk of naan at my feet.

My stomach was still full of cheap Mexican food, but I felt I couldn't refuse. I tore off a piece of the delightfully soft, still-warm(!) bread and took a bite. My reaction was both involuntary and absolutely sincere: "Mmmm!" 

"My wife make," Basir said proudly.

"It's delicious!" I said. She grinned from ear to ear. Clearly, she knew that word.

The tea, too, was fabulous. It reminded me of the chai tea that my cousin Leslie had made for my family many years before. "Milk tea," the woman said.

I couldn't stop smiling, incredulous that I was actually sitting cross-legged on a Persian rug, eating freshly made bread and drinking sweet tea from a tiny cup while conversing awkwardly with my brand-new neighbors. I'd heard from my friend Angie about this warm hospitality, but I'd never experienced it for myself. To think, I'd been worried that I might be sitting alone in my new apartment with no friends!

No, despite the broken window and nonfunctional air conditioner, I could already tell that this adventure would bring far more joy than sacrifice. 

*Names changed to protect privacy

Diana Took This Picture of Me That Morning




Wednesday, August 14, 2024

The Disastrous Debut of the Dunlap Quartet: Rick's Tribute

Last, but not least, here is the eulogy presented by Dad's only son, Richard Allen.

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Most eulogies are a collection of stories about positive aspects of the departed. I’m going to mix things up a little. I am going to start with a story about one of my dad’s flaws: Dad was a terrible singer!

One of my early memories is of me sitting next to my dad in church with him singing old-timey hymns in an extreme off-key manner. I had to plug my ear to block his singing so that I could attempt to sing on-key.

A Dubious Idea

One day, my family was asked to sing for the outreach program at one of the local nursing homes. We knew that this was a bad idea, but felt that we couldn’t say no.  We dutifully practiced our number, but it didn’t matter; we were still terrible. 

When the time came to sing our number for the old folks gathered, we were all very nervous. Melody played the piano while my Dad, Mom, and I “sang.” Well... Dad started to giggle. The giggling spread to Mom and me despite our efforts to suppress it.  Soon, the giggling spread more widely.  Dad tried to stifle the giggle by closing his mouth, but it came out through his nose... along with some other things which hit the top of my head.  Feeling this, I turned around to glare at him. Dad erupted into laughter, followed by Mom, me, and nearly the entire place.  We were unable to finish our song.

Afterwards, a sweet little old lady told us that she really appreciated our number and was greatly touched by it.  I don’t know if she was just being nice, or if she appreciated the comedy.  

That was the end of the Dunlap Family Quartet. We were not destined to be the next Partridge Family.  On the plus side, though, we were never asked to sing again.

Photo Taken a Year or Two After Our Disastrous Debut
Rick, Amy, Sarah, Melody

Carrying on the Family Line

I come from a long line of one-son families, going all the way back to my great grandfather Arthur Dunlap.  My grandfather Arta used to pressure me to “have lots of sons to keep the Dunlap name alive.”  I didn’t do so well because Diane and I only had one son and one daughter.  My son Mitchell and his lovely wife Michelle, however, did a much better job as they have three boys: Miles, Caleb, and Landon. This made my dad very happy.

Our Family Line: Miles, Mitchell, Caleb, Dad, Me

I don’t mean to imply that my dad loved his son more than his four daughters; he most certainly loved all of his children equally.  Dad was just very old-fashioned and believed that a father has a duty to teach his son how to be a man and father. He fulfilled this duty well.

Early to Rise

Dad believed that a man gets up at an insanely early hour, and that he is at least an hour early for work each day (you never know... you could have a flat tire on the way to work). When I was a teenager, he would literally drag me out of bed far earlier than was necessary and frog march me to the table. He would then talk to me and make me breakfast. I may not have appreciated at the time why he did this, but as I matured I began to understand--although I still don’t like to eat breakfast.

From when I was young and on through engineering school, I was lucky enough to work with my father on many jobs. We seem to be our most relaxed and closest when we were working together.  We carried this tradition on throughout my father’s life through completing numerous projects together.

Staying Active in Retirement

After my dad retired, he kept himself busy with projects, odd jobs, and yard mowing. At one point he was mowing multiple yards in addition to his own and mine.

Ready to Get to Work

Dad would show up to mow my yard at around 5:30 or so and wait in his truck until it was light enough to begin mowing. Diane and I would awake to the sound of the lawn mower before it was even fully light outside.  Dad would be finished with the job around the time I would be having my first cup of coffee. He would sit there with me on the patio drinking coffee and discussing things: current events, sports, family, etc.  These are some of my most cherished memories.

As my dad got older and slowed down, he dropped all other mowing jobs except for his own yard and mine. I frequently asked if he was up to mowing my yard. Up until the end he would always say that he was.

At age 91, he went the the VA for a checkup, and his doctor noted that he was in really good shape for a 91-year-old man. She asked what he did to stay so fit. He told her that he mowed yards. She reacted, “Oh my, Mr. Dunlap, you are far too old to be mowing yards. You should have your son mow your yard.” My Dad said that he was afraid to tell the doctor that he mowed his son’s yard too.

Last year when Dad was 92, I could see that he was struggling to mow my yard, and I asked him again if he was still capable of mowing. He answered that perhaps it was time for him to stop. I knew then that as tough and strong as my dad was, time was finally catching up with him in the end.

Monday, August 12, 2024

Cowboy Buddies: Tribute from Amy

Here is the eulogy shared by my older sister Amy Beth, the middle child. 

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I didn't think I'd have anything to say about Dad, but God brought to mind what I could say about Dad. 

The first thing is Dad was real quiet and didn't talk much, but although he was quiet, he was definitely there. He was always there. He was in the background, but he had a mighty presence in his family. He could always be counted on to be there. He showed his love by doing. He lovingly hung all my pictures and knick-knacks in my apartment. That's what gave him joy. 


The second thing is when I moved to Texas with Mom and Dad. He handed me his razor and said, "You're my barber now." I was scared because I never cut hair before. I did it the first time and found out it wasn't that hard. I cut Dad's hair about every six weeks for three years. That became a special time between Dad and I. I loved cutting Dad's hair. And he loved his time with me. 

Lastly, Dad was an avid Cowboys fan. I was his Cowboys buddy. We watched the Cowboy games together. One of the last games we watched together, I got drowsy and dozed off. My dad got upset and woke me up because he wanted me to watch the game with him. 

I wasn't going to talk about this, but Aunt Sue told me I should. The last time I spent with Dad before he died, I was sitting in the living room with my dad. The last thing my sister Melody told my parents when she dropped me off at my parents' was that I was not supposed to sleep during the day. I got drowsy and went to sleep. Daddy kept poking me with his cane to wake me up. He took his job seriously and kept poking me. He thought it was really funny, which I did not. I was really angry at him. I know he was doing it because he really loved me. But his sense of humor shone through because he loved to tease me. He had a fun loving heart. He was a lot of fun even when he was being annoying.

Dad with His "Poker"
At Granddaughter Erin's Wedding, 2021 

He was a great man and left a huge hole when he left this earth. He's now in heaven, dancing for joy. 

Love you, Dad! Goodbye. 

Sunday, August 11, 2024

A Working Man's Hands: Tribute from Emily

I so enjoyed all of the eulogies that I asked my siblings if I could share theirs, too. This one was written by Dad's youngest child, my sister Emily Diane.

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Strong, steadfast, faithful, hardworking, dependable, provider, protector, man of integrity, God-fearing. These are just a few of Dad's many virtues.

You might be wondering why Dad is not dressed traditionally in a suit and tie. Well, that's just not who he was. Dad was a hardworking man. He rarely ever wore suits. 

Dad loved the Texas Rangers. He literally cried tears of joy when they won the World Series. Afterwards, I bought him a World Series Champions T-shirt. He was so looking forward to wearing it to a Rangers game this season with Rick, but was called to his heavenly home before he had the chance to wear it. So what could be more fitting than for him to wear it into his eternal rest?

With Son Rick and Grandson Sean

Family was everything to Dad. He was happiest when surrounded by us. Well that, along with watching Newsmax, according to Mom, for eleven hours a day. 

I can see him now, sitting in his old easy chair in the living room, his whole face lighting up upon seeing us enter the room. We were always welcomed with a warm smile, hug, and kiss on the cheek.

With My Son Knox in the Easy Chair

As a little girl, I remember Daddy as a big, strong man with calloused hands; a carpenter with working man's hands. Deep down though, he was a big teddy bear. And as he grew in years, so did his tenderness.

One of my favorite early childhood memories is of him making pancakes for the family. He was always sure to make Sarah and I "Doll pancakes" as he liked to call them. These were tiny drops of pancake batter that dripped onto the griddle, no bigger than the size of a dime or nickel. We would snack on these while we eagerly awaited our pancakes. 

Mom, Dad, Me, Sarah - 1975

Another fond memory I have is as a 6 year-old little girl on Dad's 50th birthday. I made him a homemade birthday card and gifted him with a couple of my Barbie dolls. With a chuckle and genuine gratitude, he pulled me onto his lap and gave me the biggest hug. I'm pretty sure he treasured that gift more than any other he received that year.

And of course I can't forget how when Amy, Sarah, and I were growing up, we were woken up each morning by the sound of Dad's jolly voice, "Get up squirrels, I mean girls!," which always brought a smile to our face.

Dad was goofy and had a great sense of humor. He had the best laugh. A contagious laughter that would spread across the room. 

A favorite memory from recent years is of him telling us about a time when he had made himself a hamburger. He grabbed the mustard from the refrigerator, squeezed it onto his burger, and took a big, juicy bite. "What in the world?!" he exclaimed as he looked down and saw the butterscotch syrup on the counter, which he had grabbed by mistake. "Oh well," he said, and ate it anyway. He got so tickled telling us about it, and the room just burst into laughter.

Dad was a fierce protector. Years before I was born, when Melody, Monica, and Rick were small children, and Mom and Dad lived in California, they were coming home one night, driving through a sketchy part of LA. They came across a chain gang blocking the road and heading straight toward them. Without giving it a second thought, Dad hit the gas and plowed right through them. Being a man of integrity, though, he drove straight to the police station to report what he had done. They said, "Sir, you did the right thing. They would have surely killed you and your family." Dad was a hero.

Monica, Mom, Rick, Melody

I have many more stories and could go on and on about how wonderful Dad was, but it is only fair to give my brother and sisters a chance to share their love as well.

As long as I live, I will share Dad's legacy. And until we meet again, Daddy, I love you. Forever, your Baby Girl.

Saturday, August 10, 2024

Tribute from a Daddy's Girl

I have always been a Daddy's girl. During one of our conversations last week, Dad reminded me of his ritual of lying down on the floor next to the heat register for a nap after work and how, as a toddler, I'd lie down right next to him and go to sleep.

1972

Though I can't remember this, I'm told that I loved him so much that he never needed to spank me when I was naughty. All he had to do was frown at me and I would burst into tears. 

There was so much to love about Dad. 

Friday, July 26, 2024

He's Especially Fond of My Mama

A couple of Sundays ago, I raced to get ready for church in time, as usual, because I had slept in a little longer than I should have. Surveying the dresses in my closet, my eyes fell on a blue one that I hadn't worn in a year or two. I almost passed it over due to the lack of sleeves; I tend to get cold in the air conditioning, and I had no idea where my one pretty sweater might be. I felt almost compelled to wear the dress, though, so I pulled it off its hanger and stooped to retrieve the heeled sandals I usually wear with it.

Wonder of wonders, I was on track for an on-time departure when I remembered the beaded necklace in two shades of blue that goes perfectly with this dress. There was no time to look for it unless I wanted to be late for church. I hesitated at the door to the garage. Although I knew God didn't care one bit about my dress nor my perfectly matched jewelry, I again felt an odd compulsion. I finally sprinted back to the closet to rifle through the battered jewelry box on the shelf. 

The first thing I saw when I flipped open the top was my mother's wedding ring set, which she'd given to me for safekeeping while she was in the hospital with a broken hip many months ago. Oh, Mom's ring! I thought. She's been wanting that. 

I slipped it on my finger and resolved to give it to her that very afternoon. I found the beaded necklace in the third drawer and draped it over my neck triumphantly. There was no time to glance in the mirror, but I smiled at the recollection of how beautiful the beads looked against the blue floral fabric. 

Mom's smile was even broader when I handed over the ring a few hours later. "I'm sorry I kept it so long," I said sheepishly. "I kept forgetting that I had it--even though you asked me for it several times. How long has it been? Nearly a year?"

"Nearly two years," she said. "It was the February before last." 

Guilt pierced my heart. What a terribly long time to go without her ring! 

Later, when I hugged her goodbye, Mom told me again how happy she was to have her ring back. "I told God just a few days ago that I really wanted my ring," she said. "I told Him I didn't want to bother my daughter about it again."

"You were praying about it?" I asked. Before she could answer, I said, "You know you could have asked me. I know that I'm horribly forgetful. I wouldn't have been offended." 

"I wasn't really praying," she said. "I just mentioned it to Him." 

"Wow, Mom! He loves you so much," I said, and then I told her the story of wanting to wear the dress, and then feeling compelled to wear the necklace. 

Her smile was so radiant that she reminded me of a teenager in love for the first time. Yes, God is especially fond of my mother. I love the creative ways that he works... even through my vanity! 

Mom Holding a Treasure Even More Precious than Her Rings
Great-Grandson Beckham

Another Sweet Treasure - Penny Jayne


Tuesday, July 9, 2024

My First Spanish Sacred Echo

It was hard to get out of bed yesterday after a four-day weekend that I packed entirely too full of cooking and cleaning and driving all over creation. Still, I managed to move quickly enough for a short quiet time before departing for my weekly office day.

Sweet Riggy, My Faithful Quiet-Time Buddy


The entry in my Jesus Listens devotional encouraged me, as always. I especially enjoyed a beloved verse in Isaiah 41, which felt new because I was reading in Spanish. I always read the Bible in Spanish so that I can avoid the complacency that comes with familiarity, and also so that I can practice my pronunciation. 

"Do not be afraid," I read. "Don't be dis... couraged? For I am with you. I am your God. I will... strengthen you. I will sustain you with my right hand." 

Sunday, June 9, 2024

Take a Walk with Me - Eighteen Years of Wonderful Memories

This past Friday, my baby girl turned 18. The night before that inconceivable event, I sat down to write about it, but as I combed through years of blog stories looking for pictures, I took a turn down memory lane and spent the evening reading about Allyson's life. I hope you'll take a walk with me down through the years.

The story actually begins about 21 years ago, after Bill and I decided we wanted to start a family. The 19 months it took us to conceive felt interminable. It occurs to me now what a blink in time that was compared with the dizzying passage of time these last 18 years. 

We were on a Carribean cruise with Ethan when I finally learned I was pregnant--after I'd already filled the prescription for a fertility drug that I would never need to take. 

At this point, my suspected pregnancy was a fragile, secret hope

Excerpt from my journal, 10/7/05:
I slept fitfully last night, waiting for the light, waiting to take my test. I got up around 7:30 and crept to the bathroom. I set the test stick flat on the lavatory and watched the fluid spread across the window. The reference line appeared immediately, but there was no test line at first. My stomach sank. [This experience had become far too familiar.]

But then I saw a second line, very faint, begin to materialize. I strained to see it, and yes, it got darker and darker. There definitely were two lines, though the second was lighter. I sat and smiled at myself in the tiny mirror. I didn't cry.

I climbed back in bed and snuggled up to Bill. I was too excited to fall back asleep, but I lay there for another hour enjoying my secret....
Of course, what I wanted most was a healthy baby, but I yearned for a daughter. 

Sunday, May 19, 2024

The Best Miserable Birthday

Months ahead of my birthday last month, I told Allyson and Ethan that all I wanted this year was a family camping trip, our first in six years. I had actually reserved a campsite twice in the fall, but both times I had to cancel due to rain in the forecast. This time, I reserved a site with a covered shelter and handicap access so that my sister Amy could go with us, and I was determined not to cancel no matter what. Since forgetfulness runs in our family, I reminded them many times over the ensuing months.

In the days before the campout, the weather forecast grew more and more ominous, but I doggedly held onto our plans. The rain wasn't scheduled to begin until Saturday, so I reasoned that we'd have one good night and could wait out the rain in the covered shelter playing games. 

The celebration began on my actual birthday, a Thursday. Allyson and I drove to my parents' house, where I met Amy and our sister Melody, with whom she lives currently. We enjoyed a delicious meal and our favorite dessert, a concoction made of Butterfinger candy bars, vanilla pudding, ice cream, and Cool Whip. 

Allyson gave me two delightfully practical gifts, a table lamp for my room and a comfortable workout shirt to wear to the gym that I joined recently. She also gave me my favorite healthy candy bar. Best of all, instead of a card, she gave me a full-page handwritten letter that assured me all the love I've poured into her has been received.

Mom and my sisters gave me sweet cards and gifts, too. 

I spent the rest of that evening and the next morning doing what I always do before trips: preparing lots of food and packing my little Kia to the gills. Ethan and his wife Sumer drove out to my house around noon to play with their cat Riggy, whom I've been fostering, and to load up whatever wouldn't fit into my car. This time I had Amy's wheelchair and several other essential items, so packing had been even more of a challenge. 

Ethan, Sumer, and Allyson went on ahead while I packed up the last of the food. Amy and I left about an hour and a half after our planned departure, which is pretty typical. We arrived late in the afternoon to find that Ethan and Allyson had set up their tents, and Allyson was relaxing in her hammock, which she'd strung between two trees. 

The Campsite

The site was amazing! The rectangular covered shelter nestled among lush trees, so close to the lake that you could hear the water lapping against the shore. Just behind and below the shelter was a collection of giant rocks that formed a scenic overlook. I smiled as I pictured how Ethan would have clambered over the rocks if we'd reserved this site on camping trips decades before. 


If You Look Closely, You Can See the Lake

Thursday, December 7, 2023

Good News!

The radiologist called me today and let me know that Monday's biopsy was benign. He said the quality of the samples was excellent, and he is "confident that it is not cancer." 

The site has been marked and will be followed closely on future mammograms.

Thank the Lord! Thank you, everyone, for your love and prayers. 



Saturday, September 23, 2023

Eternal Beauty

Recently I was reflecting on how dry I have felt spiritually, wondering why I don't seem to hear God's voice as much as I did in the past. It must be because because I'm always so busy with day-to-day responsibilities that I don't have much time to be still, let alone think about anything eternal.

This morning, God reminded me that He still speaks. 

After sleeping in until nearly nine, I fed the pets--four of them now; I'll have to tell you about that another day. I poured my sister Amy a bowl of cereal, put in a load of laundry, and walked across the park to meditate on my scripture memory cards. By now it was nearly ten, and it was shockingly hot. I hadn't even made it out of the cul-de-sac before the sun beating on my back nearly made me rethink my decision. The house was a wreck, and there was plenty I could be doing in the air conditioning, but I pressed on. 

When I reached the big circle in the middle of the park, I hesitated in the shade on the path. I looked to my right, where I'd planned to go. That way leads to my favorite part of the park, where the path ends in a little loop overhung with giant trees. I'd had a lovely time studying my scriptures at a picnic table there the week before. Surveying the path, I realized there were zero trees shading the path as far as I could see.

To my left, the other picnic table where I've often meditated on my scriptures was sitting in full sun. That would not be an option. Then I gazed across the soccer field to the playground, half full of energetic children. Next to that was the basketball court, where a few teenagers were shooting baskets. The picnic tables over there were in full shade, but I craved silence. I sighed, poised to return home. 

No! I wanted to study my scriptures, and I wanted to do it surrounded by green trees and grass and blue skies, not dirty laundry. As soon as I set foot on the big circular sidewalk leading to the playground, the sun beat down on me mercilessly. The soccer field was empty at this hour, so I made a sudden left and cut across the grass.

Sweat was just beginning to trickle down my back when I reached the shade next to the playground. I settled onto one of the picnic table benches and pulled out a stack of cards. Immediately, a little red spider crawled onto my hand. I crushed it without a thought, then felt bad. Keeping my eyes on the little business cards where I have copied perhaps 20 precious memory passages that God has given me over the last couple of decades, I tried to imagine that I was alone.

I whispered verse after verse to myself, marveling that I hardly needed to glance at the cards even though I often go months without pulling them out to refresh my memory. The familiar, beloved words filled my mind and heart as the voices of children and teenagers receded out of my consciousness. A cool breeze lifted my hair, and I smiled. "Thank you," I whispered.

One thing that I couldn't block out was the parade of spiders that crawled over my hands, my legs, my phone, and the little black bag where I keep the scripture cards. I carefully knocked each one away. The only other thing that I smashed was a fire ant that bit my calf. 

After about 20 minutes, I'd had all of the spiders I could take, so I stacked my cards and stowed them in the bag, inspecting for wayward critters before I fastened the Velcro. Considering my options for returning home, I decided to walk away from the big circle and over the other bridge, hoping there might be more shade on that path. 

As I crossed the bridge, I noticed two hand-painted plaques leaning against the low concrete wall, each decorated with random embellishments such as angels and rainbows. "Add a painted stone," the first said. The second said, "To see how long I can get." What on earth was that supposed to mean?

Then my eyes moved lower, to a line of painted stones that extended all the way down the wall and partway down the path. There were humble colored rocks in every color, along with elaborately decorated stones with googly eyes and glitter. How wonderful, I thought. I don't know why, but that crooked line of painted stones really moved me. One person, probably a child, had made a sweet gesture and invited others to do the same... and they had answered the call. 

I looked back and forth down the line of stones and took it all into my heart, a smile stretching across my face, the hot sun momentarily forgotten.

As I cut across the Frisbee golf course under the shade of two giant trees, I opened my mouth and let the joy bubble out. "Thank you for putting beauty in the heart of man," I whispered. A Bible verse tickled the back of my mind, just out of reach. Beauty in the heart of man.... Or was it eternity in the heart of man? Maybe it was both, I decided. God set the beauty of eternity in the heart of man, so that we could look up from the darkness around us and the tedium of everyday life and take pleasure in all the little joys around us, so that we could find beauty and make beauty, and we could do it together. 

On the short walk home, I thanked God for the painted rocks, the shade, the breeze, the scriptures, and even for the labor unions who gifted us with weekends. Back at the house, I measured out 12 grams of coffee beans and poured them in my little hand grinder, mixing in some vanilla flavored chicory. I only drink one cup of coffee a week, which is one cup more than my doctor wants me to have. That makes it extra special. I let the coffee steep for four minutes in the French press and then pressed the plunger down.

Turning my back on the dirty dishes, I carried the coffee to my room and plunked down in my favorite easy chair. I read my Jesus Calling devotional, which never gets old even though I'm now on my third year of daily readings. Next, I wrote three pages of increasingly messy cursive in my gratitude journal; I've been making myself write in cursive for the last several weeks because I don't like to think that cursive is a dying art, and also because I've read that it's good for the brain. In any case, I don't like my sloppy writing, but it does get easier the more I do it. 

After all that gratitude, my chores were calling to me, but then I remembered that I'd been unable to complete an entry in my latest Write the Word journal a couple of days before because my pen had run out of ink. My work could wait a few more minutes, I decided. I flipped to the page marked with a ribbon and then wrinkled my forehead in confusion. The date of the entry was May 8, 2021. Oh, this was the wrong journal. It was the first of my three Write the Word journals, a gift from my boss a couple of years ago. 

Since the book was in my hands, I decided to read an old entry. I love looking back on old journal entries, like stepping back in time. I riffled through the pages, wondering where I should read. I finally settled on the second entry, from May 5, 2021. My eyes widened when I read the verse I had copied in neat, crisp print. You can probably guess what verse it was, but I was flabbergasted!

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men, yet they cannot fathom the work that God has done from beginning to end.

I know that there is nothing better for them than to rejoice and do good while they live, and also that every man should eat and drink and find satisfaction in all his labor—this is the gift of God. (Ecclesiastes 3:11-13) 

Below the passage, I had written, "How can God make everything beautiful? I know He does it in His time, in its time. It takes time to build beauty, and in time that beauty becomes visible.... I love it that God thinks the best thing we can do is rejoice. He wants us to have joy and do good, and to enjoy doing good. He wants us to eat and drink and enjoy the fruit of our labor. That feeling of 'job well done' is God's gift to us." 

I left that other journal entry unfinished so I could revel in this sacred echo. I'd been right. The passage was about both eternity and beauty. Also, it showed me that God had enjoyed hearing my list of everyday joys just a few minutes before.

I set the journal back in the bin tenderly and set about my weekend chores with a light heart. Oh yes! God still speaks to me. But only when I take the time to listen.

More beauty in my day:

Allyson's Last Homecoming Dance

Best Friends

Tuesday, July 11, 2023

The Gift of Renewed Appreciation

In a relatively recent entry, I related how God gave me a gift I didn't know I wanted, in the form of a Lab mix named Olive. A few months later, He gave me another gift I hadn't been looking for. 

Long before Olive came along, two cats joined our family. The first was Arwen, a Russian blue that Ethan picked out. She was soon followed by CiCi, a white and gray scamp with an astonishing capacity for dreaming up mischief. 

In truth, I never wanted a cat at all, but my two children wore me down with their relentless pleading. We'd all suffered a staggering blow when Bill and I divorced, and I wanted to give them a little joy as we embarked on our new life in a single-parent household. Arwen and CiCi fulfilled every misgiving that had fueled my arguments against owning a cat, and they had additional vices I'd never even imagined. Even so, Arwen quickly stole my heart, but that is another story. 

CiCi came to us as a baby whom I could hold in one hand. Although she was impossibly cute, she was all claws and teeth, and much of my affection ebbed away each time she drew blood in the fight to keep stolen food, or used her claws to communicate her desire to be left alone. 
Baby CiCi and Allyson

Orphaned as a newborn, CiCi has been a talented scavenger from the start. We soon learned there is virtually nothing she won't eat; for example, she licks out empty cans of tomato paste the moment I set them on the counter. She shares my love of carbohydrates but has an advantage over me in that she can literally sniff out tortillas and loaves of bread within seconds. For that reason, we can never leave grocery bags unguarded, or else we will find holes in the wrapper and hunks of bread missing, or a perfect half moon cut out of a stack of tortillas. But her favorite food is anything she can fish out of the toaster, such as my beloved pancakes. 

Tuesday, January 31, 2023

I Wasn't Surprised

 As I mentioned in my previous entry, Allyson has taken her role as co-captain of the Academic Decathlon team very seriously, especially in recent weeks as they were preparing for their regional meet. Over Christmas break, I was shocked when she woke up early one morning to meet her teammates at a coffee shop for a study session which she had organized. And I was even more impressed when she came home and said she'd really enjoyed it. 

Last Monday (January 23), she went to her room with an energy drink after an early supper to study and finish planning her speech. 

"Will it be a late night?" I asked. "I'm afraid you won't be able to sleep if you drink that."

She nodded. "I need it to stay awake. I'll probably be up until 2 or 3." 

The next morning after she'd left for school, I came across the note cards for her speech on the bathroom counter. The top card captured my attention with a riveting introduction. I knew she planned to share the speech with me when she was finished, but I couldn't resist reading the whole thing right then. I smiled as I flipped through the cards because it took me back to speech class in college, when I'd written my notes on index cards just like these; I'd figured that no one wrote notes in ink anymore due to all the electronic options these days. (The notes, it turns out, were only for practicing. At the actual competition, she would have to give her speech from memory.)

I noted with satisfaction the smooth transitions, the appeals to emotion and logic, and the statistics she used to back her claim that hateful rhetoric in the media incites physical violence. I noted one section where the transition felt a little abrupt but decided not to mention it unless she asked for my advice. 

That same evening, Allyson asked me to brew her a pot of coffee after dinner for another late night. As I twisted the hand grinder that I use each Saturday to prepare my one cup of coffee each week, I marveled that my little girl was old enough to drink coffee--even though she's actually been drinking it for several years. It felt different, somehow, like when my parents used to drink coffee from a Thermos to stay awake all night on cross-country trips.

About four hours later, when I was getting ready for bed, Allyson came into my room for a few minutes for our usual bedtime prayer. When I asked if she had any requests, she asked that God would help her perform well at the upcoming Academic Decathlon competition scheduled for the coming Friday and Saturday (January 27-28). 

"You left the notes for your speech in the bathroom today," I said. "I hope you don't mind that I read them. I think your speech is really strong. I especially like the intro. It really grabbed my attention." 

She frowned. "I don't like my speech at all. I'm going to work on it tonight."

"Are you just tweaking it, or revamping it completely?" I contemplated offering advice about the transition, but her answer made it irrelevant.

"Revamping it."

Next, she told me about the sleepover she'd planned for the team on Friday night. Other teams who'd traveled to compete would be staying in a hotel and using every moment together to study, and Allyson wanted her team to have the same advantage. "The whole team--well, the nine people who are competing--will be spending the night at my dad's."

"Won't you need to go to bed early?"

"We have to cram for Saturday," she said. 

She said it was the first sleepover some of the girls had ever been to, and she was nervous about making it an experience that everyone would enjoy. I was touched that she was not only concerned with the studying, but also with making everyone feel comfortable.

So we prayed that the study session would be productive and fun for everyone, and then I asked God to help Allyson as she reworked her speech that evening, and that He would help her deliver the speech in a way that would impact everyone who heard it. 

Quizzing Each Other with Flashcards
The Sleepover Was A Success Both Academically and Socially

Thursday, December 15, 2022

A Gift I Didn't Know I Wanted

If you've been reading a long time, you know that I have experienced some frustrations with my pets. I have one sweet cat and one rather mean cat, and both of them are very, very naughty. Their main vice is stealing food--sometimes right off our plates--and they have many other terrible habits, like clawing the furniture and occasionally even peeing on piles of laundry... which may or may have been lying on my bed for days waiting to be folded. 

Sometime last spring, Allyson asked if I might think about getting a dog. My first response was that we already had two pets too many, and my second was that I really am not a dog person. But she said having a dog at my house would really make her happy, so I promised to think about the idea. We prayed about it, and I promptly forgot all about it. 

In April, Allyson's former stepsister Morgan asked if we could keep Olive for a couple of weeks while she looked for another home. I agreed readily, thinking it would be a good chance to try out having a dog with no strings attached, and if it didn't work out, we could put the whole thing behind us.

Olive had been Allyson's dog, too, at her dad's house. They'd decided to get a puppy after Lola passed away, and they chose Olive because she looked a lot like her. (Lola had been my dog, too, until shortly after the divorce.) If you've been reading a very long time, you may remember that my fondness for Lola was tempered with aggravation over her perpetual mischief, such as the time she ate my favorite cloth diaper with the duckies on it right off the clothesline or the time she murdered my tomato plants. So I was surprised at the surge of tenderness I felt when I first met Olive. She resembles Lola so much that I often accidentally call her by that name.

Lola on Left, Olive on Right

Sunday, November 27, 2022

Simply Wonderful

Last Saturday, the day of Ethan and Sumer's wedding, dawned chilly and overcast. Though it had seemed quite bearable when I arrived late in the morning, the temperature began dropping as sunset approached. By four o'clock, it was cold enough to set my teeth chattering despite the beautiful winter white coat I'd borrowed from my sister Emily, but I was grateful that at least it wasn't raining.

As Sumer slowly walked from the bridal suite toward the outdoor ceremony area, I asked to carry her train. I'd already extricated a leaf or two from the lacy hem, and I wanted it to be pristine when she walked down the aisle. At my side was Ethan's stepmother, Erica. Tottering over the paved walkway on numb toes in my unaccustomed heels, I alternated between worrying about breaking an ankle and savoring the gathering of in-laws, exes, and ex-laws to honor and celebrate with two young people whom we all loved.

At that moment, Allyson hurried around the corner in her own unaccustomed heels and a beautiful full-length, velvety green dress. "Mama," she called urgently. "Where have you been? You're the first to go down the aisle!" 

"What? I'm part of the procession?" 

"Yes! Ethan is walking you and Sumer's mom down the aisle first. Hurry up!" 

Saturday, November 26, 2022

Procrastination, Preparation, and Anticipation

Last Saturday my boy became a husband! Although Ethan and Sumer were engaged for over a year, it still sort of crept up on me. I found myself scrambling at the last minute, as I do for most important events in my life... and the unimportant ones, too.

It began with Sumer's bridal shower, the first I'd ever hosted. I was nervous about all of it—the games, the decorations, the food—so I procrastinated about planning it until I'd nearly run out of time. But thanks to Pinterest and some advice from my boss and a coworker, it all came together nicely! I made way too much baked potatoes, grilled chicken, vegetable soup, and salad, but that was okay because we sent quite a lot home with my mom, who has been unable to cook since a fall on Labor Day weekend. 

For dessert we ate pumpkin-spice Nothing Bundt cake with thick cream-cheese frosting and my sister Emily's pineapple-sherbet punch, which she graciously made for me when she arrived, after picking up both the cake and our mother.

Allyson was in charge of decorations, and she made the party beautiful with a cute little marquis, a big banner, giant balloons, three little bouquets that doubled as prizes for the games, and a pink sparkly sash for the bride-to-be.




Allyson and Sumer

Friday, February 4, 2022

Mi casa tica / My Costa Rican House

EN ESPAÑOL ABAJO

In November, I visited Costa Rica for the third time. I had planned to share many stories, but time got away from me. Here are a couple of stories that I've been working on here and there for weeks, and I hope to find time for more soon. As usual, I will write my stories in Spanish and then translate them to English so you can see my progress. Note that all grammar errors in the dialogue are mine. If you speak Spanish, you may also notice that I use the informal verb forms when I talk with Zeidy even though I call her usted (the formal word for you). This is the custom in Costa Rica. Everyone there is usted, even spouses, babies, and dogs. This is seen as a sign of respect. Yet most people use the verb forms and pronouns for tú in conversation, probably for clarity because the subjects of sentences are almost always omitted. This mixing of usted and tú used to drive me crazy and keep me confused, but I've learned to just go with it. (Honestly, I make so many other errors that this doesn't matter anyway.)

ENGLISH TRANSLATION AT BOTTOM

En noviembre visité Costa Rica por tercera vez. Tenía planeado compartir muchas historias, pero el tiempo se me escapó. Aquí hay unas historias en las que he estado trabajando durante unas pocas semanas, y espero encontrar tiempo para más pronto. Como de costumbre, voy a escribir mis historias en español y luego las traducir al inglés para que las personas que no hablan español puedan ver mi progreso. Si hablas español, probablemente puedes notar que uso las formas verbales informales cuando hablo con Zeidy aunque la llamo usted. Esta es la costumbre en Costa Rica. Todos allí son ustedes, incluso esposos, bebés y perros. Esto se ve como una señal de respeto. Sin embargo, la mayoría de la gente usa las formas verbales y los pronombres para tú en una conversación, probablemente para mayor claridad porque casi siempre se omiten los sujetos de las oraciones. En el pasado, esta mezcla de tú y usted me volvía loca y me confundía, pero he aprendido a dejar de seguir las reglas gramaticales. (En verdad, cometo tantos otros errores que esto no importa.)

[Todos errores gramatical en el diágolo son mios.]

Durante este viaje, no asistí la escuela de español, pero ciertamente aprendía a través de la inmersión.  Me quedé por dos semanas con mi amiga Zeidy, la hija de Doña Macha, con quien me había quedado durante mis otros viajes. Aunque dos años habían pasado, inmediatamente este lugar me sentí como mi hogar. Que extraño, porque toda allá es tan diferente, un mundo separado. 

Doña Macha, yo, Zeidy

La casa de Zeidy está un poco grande en comparación con otras, con tres habitaciones, una grande sala, una cocina pequeña y dos baños.  Cada cuarto tiene ventanas con pequeños rectángulos de vidrio que giran en bisagras como una persiana veneciana, y estas ventanas están siempre abiertas, aún cuando hay lluvia.  


No hay mosquiteros, y los bichos y las iguanas entran libremente. A veces, también entran los gatos pequeños como esta dulce gatita que se llama Cat (el apodo para Katerina). 


Casi todas las noches, Cat salió a través de la ventana de Zeidy y entró a través de mi ventana.  Se sentó en mi pecho o envolvió alrededor de mi cuello y durmió conmigo hasta la mañana.  Aunque usualmente prefiero no dormir con mascotas, me sentí tan cómoda con ella. Me recordé de mis gatas Arwen y CiCi, y me hizo que sentir como en casa.  En verdad, Cat era casi tan traviesa que CiCi: a ella le gusta que comer las flores artificiales y que cavar en el suelo de las muchas plantas verdes alrededor de la casa.

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