The most peculiar and wonderful thing happened to me on Tuesday night. I was on the way to Ethan's meet-the-teacher night, alone, and I was thinking about a blog entry that you'll probably read in a couple of weeks. I was contemplating whether the entry needs a melodrama alert, and my thoughts were a cross between a monologue and a polite debate.
"Anyone who's been reading my blog any length of time already knows I'm melodramatic," I argued mentally. "So why do I need a melodrama warning?"
"True. I can't help it. God just made me that way," I agreed.
Suddenly, my lips began to twitch because I had the strong suspicion that God was laughing at me. I laughed along with Him. "Yes, you did make me that way, didn't you?" I said aloud. "You made me dramatic on purpose, and you like that about me."
I laughed for a good block, and it was the most exhilarating feeling. I don't ever recall sharing a joke with God before, but I hope it happens again. Once I could stop laughing, I quoted part of my beloved Psalm 139: "I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful; I know that full well."
I thought about my basket case life, and I was actually thankful for my mercurial temperament. I realized that I love the "quirky" parts of my personality because along with the drama comes passion, and I think my passion is the core of who I am. I'm passionate about books, gardening, and cooking. I'm passionate about writing--everything from training materials to blog entries. I'm passionate about prayer and scripture memory. I'm passionate about parenting, friendship, and marriage.
The downside--which I experienced just today, as a matter of fact--is that I feel my negative emotions just as intensely. I'm prone to beating myself up for mistakes, for thinking the world is coming to an end when someone hurts me, and for suspecting a slide into insanity whenever I suffer anxiety.
Still, I don't care to step off the roller coaster. The joy of "rising on the wings of the dawn" far outweighs the agony of "making my bed in the depths" (Psalm 139:8-9).
What About You?
What is it that makes you special? What is it about you that makes God laugh with delight? Did he endow you with a character trait that is both a strength and a weakness?
THESE ARE NOT RHETORICAL QUESTIONS. I'd really like to know.